Results 1 to 5 of 5

Thread: Gradilocks

  1. #1
    Big Cheese Captain LYK08's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2014

    Post Gradilocks

    In the enchanted city of Southridge, there lived a young man named Jack and 2 of his family members - Jack Jr. (his son) and Janise (his wife)

    One fine day they were having a hearty lunch of cricket porridge at a flower garden beside the gas mask shop slightly opposite to the police station.

    Out of a sudden came a family of 4 who do not know Jack's family. This family was Jill's family comprising of Arene (her daughter) , Benzoate (her husband), and gradilocks (her second daughter). Jill's family was extremely good looking, and soon enough, Jack went shopping with Jill at Era's mall, Arene went with Jack Jr to Era Hotel up north, and Benzoate went to the zoo with Janise. What they forgot, however, was that they haven't finished their lunch.

    Gradilocks, lonely and hungry, decided to eat the cricket porridge that has been left behind by Jack's family. She ate so much she had a sugar rush because the porridge was cooked with diluted urine and chocolate-flavoured syrup, and she fell asleep at the bench.

    6 hours later, when jack's family and their counterparts from Jill's family returned to the garden, they gave one another a kiss before bidding goodbye. Until they took a look at the old mahogany bench that creaked and cranked under the weight of the sleeping Gradilock. They saw the empty bowls that were used to contain their porridge slipping down from Gradilock's lap as she tilted to the side in her sleep, snoring loudly. SNRRRR...

    On her left hand, she clutched onto a stained undergarment that she took off from herself to wipe her mouth as she did not have napkins on her. Jack's family was devasted - their cricket porridge was gone!

    "How dare she!" shouted Jack in a spit of anger. He went to his sports car, and took out a 1870s telephone that after 10 minutes of setting up the antenna, came into operation. Jack slided the wheel of the telephone frantically, dialling for the cops.

    Roughly 50 metres, behind Jack, inside the police station, Colonel Johnson picked up the phone. "Yes, Southridge Police. How can I help you sir?"

    "Its a case of theft. We require immediate assistance!"

    "Roger that, we will be arriving shortly!" Johnson exclaimed in the usual firm manner he has.


    1 hour later, a convoy of 10 police cars screeched to a grinding halt at the garden, arriving from all directions in southridge. It was a high security task as members of the Southridge Anti Terrorist unit, the Southridge Military, the Navy and the Southridge Secret Service showed up in force and surrounded the sleeping Gradilock. By then the noise of the sirens had already woken her up.

    "What's up?" she asked enthusiastically, showing a peace sign with her fingers.

    "Ma'am you are under arrest for theft of porridge. You are ordered to pay a tax of 1000 gralats, followed by a social responsibility tax of 5000 gralats. Failure to do so will get you jail time."

    "huh....oh.....okay sur.e..I'll pay..." Gradilocks stammered in shock and fear looking at at least 30 guns pointing at her from all directions. Colonel Johnson took out a card scanner and looked at Gradilocks.

    "By Nets, MasterCard , or Paypal, ma'am?"

    "MasterCard." Gradilocks replied, swipping her card on the machine that instantaneously clinked in success of payment. All officers then retracted their guns and drove off in a cacophony of cars drifting away back to the police station 30 metres away.

    Gradilocks regretted her actions of stealing, and vowed never to commit a crime again. Moral of the Story: Taxes help to correct social ills.

  2. #2
    Player Abdullah1441's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2015
    Bail is bribe.

    - - - Updated - - -

    Yo, but I'm going to say that the late 1800s and the early 1900s had the best style, so good taste on that 1870s telephone, Lyk.
    قل أفغير الله تأمروني أعبد أيها الجاهلون

  3. #3
    Bit verbose at times, but an interesting story.

    "The world is being much helped by the suffering of the poor people" -Mother Teresa
    "Apple seeds average around 0.6mg hydrogen cyanide (HCN) per gram of dry seed. Since the lethal dose of HCN is estimated to be around 50mg, you will need around 85 grams of dry seeds. This is around half a cup... it requires a lot of apples."

  4. #4
    ESSKEETIT Sottocapo JungleJimmy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2013
    Story time??????
    Youtube Channel: Jimmy Graal (RIP)

    If you know me,
    And I don't know you,
    Then I guess I'm famous enough!

  5. #5
    Related to Players
    Join Date
    May 2019
    United States
    Quote Originally Posted by LYK08 View Post
    In the enchanted city of Southridge...
    By no means is Southridge enchanted. Everyone there is nutters, I tell ya.

    AZN (Sent from my iPhone)
    Wiki (Wikipedia)
    professional post/point farmer

    discord: Agility#3286

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts